Wow!

Okay guys,
So the last year has brought a lot of new changes. I didn't graduate last may like I intended. Instead I picked up an English minor and met an amazing guy that I fell in love with...the only problem...is he doesn't feel the same way for me. But that's okay. No regrets. Other great news. I met another guy, one who does like me, for me...and he's growing on me :-). I'm becoming a fantastic writer...and am even considering doing something with English when I graduate instead of Psychology. Who knows?

That guy I fell in love with...I don't think he realizes he cares about me...and I think one day he'll get there. But I don't want to wait around for him to realize it. This other guy, the one that likes me, he's real great. He's sweet, funny, hard-working, self-sufficient, everything I'm looking for. But have you ever been so in love that you can't see anyone but that one person? That's kinda where I'm at right now. I've got this gigantic wall in front of me, kind of reminds me of that poem you learn as a kid, the bear hunt poem...can't go under it can't go around it can't go through it...yeah. That's pretty much how i feel. Its not that I don't wish I could see around him, or through him to this great guy who wants to be with me...but I just can't. Whoever has been there understands. And for those that haven't, I hope one day you do. Because this is an experience that I think everyone should have, even though it is the worst feeling in the world.

It's almost the new year again. I miss you Grandpa. Its been nearly three years since you left us and went to heaven. I'm praying everyday that you found peace. We all miss you down here. Things have been hell without you. Our entire family fell apart...I wish things were different. But they aren't. You would fix things if you were here. Everyday, the wound gets a little smaller but it still hurts. Love you lots!

The Robertson's moved to France and in a year will head to Chad. I'm not happy about it but, nothing is really different except that I don't see them anymore at all in person. I was hoping to get to go to France but that's a no go since its so expensive to fly over there. And I'm not going to go to Africa to see them...its just too hot over there. Plus I don't think I'd be able to be without the internet and phone for that long. I miss them, and those wonderful kids, but its not the end of the world they will be back.

New year's resolutions:
Graduate College...in may. No changing the mind this time. This place is driving me nuts.

learn to understand that its okay to love, and get hurt(this is a hard one)...but I'm determined to get it right.

Deuces! Catch ya guys later!